Do Life Right

There is something about the “new school year” that seems to bring out the worst in schooled parent-child relationships. Everywhere I go, I’m hearing really mean comments to kids. Sure I haven’t seen or heard the whole story, but I often have seen the set-up to the rude comments and in almost every single case, the child has been very clearly in the right and the parent has been in the wrong. Yet, we are accustomed to “respecting the parent” in these types of situations and accepting mean comments to children from adults. (When was the last time you saw a mother arrested for hitting her child in public? Public spanking happens all the time and society doesn’t do anything about it…]

This needs to stop! We need to call parents on all verbal and physical outbursts. If you wouldn’t say something to your spouse or parent or best friend, then you shouldn’t say it to your child.

I’ve talked with several mothers lately who, until recently, were homeschooling (not Unschooling) families. A year ago these mothers would have been first in line on the YOU MUST TALK NICE TO YOUR KIDS bandwagon of mine. Now, however, they are full-on in their “I wish school days were longer because I can’t stand being around my kids” mode that so many (most?) parents today are in. I’m not sure how a parent digresses from loving their newborn baby more than anyone in the world, to dreading summer vacation. I’ve seen this happen a lot when attachment parenting/mindful parenting families have children turn into “school age” kids.

What are some of the mean comments I’ve heard lately? Here is just a sampling:

• “You have two legs, get it yourself.”
• “I’m not your maid/chauffeur/slave/short-order cook.”

More written by me on this topic:

• “Meanest Mom in the Whole Wide World”

• What Not To Say To Children

• Alternatives to Punishment — NO Spankings Necessary

Here’s a great webpage of Sandra Dodd’s on “When Humor isn’t Funny“.

We’ve been fortunate enough to actually see wildlife eating the pads of some of our prickly pear cacti. We especially love watching the rabbits eat it. They take a bite into the outer rim and then eat only the inside part, leaving a circle behind. Bugs, on the other hand, eat it all - methodically. Here are two different bugs we’ve seen eating the cactus. The beetle seems to prefer the pad and the grasshopper seems to prefer the fruit. Smart bugs!

It’s really hypocritical how adults, in general, talk with children about school. [Not to mention that most adults don't even know how to talk to children without bringing up the topic of school and grades. The most frequent question my children ever get from stranger adults is: "What grade are you in?" If you are an adult - think of a new standard question to ask the children you meet. If you do this, they'll like you better and you'll get to actually know them.]

Here’s the hypocrisy: Adult tell children how important homework is. Meanwhile, they’ll readily admit to other adults that they don’t remember more than 1-5% of the homework they did as a child.

Here are a few actual conversational tidbits I’ve heard in real life lately:

Child: “I’ve got so much homework.” 1st Adult: “That’s good, it’s good for you.” 2nd Adult: “It’ll keep you from forgetting.”

Child: “This homework is so hard.” Adult: “Hard work is good for you.”

Child: “My homework is so boring.” Adult: “It’s only you that is boring.” Same adult whispering to another adult: “I’m so glad I don’t have to do any of that busy work anymore. I hated doing it.”

Adult to another adult: “I had to help my kid with 4th grade math last night. It was horrible, I couldn’t remember how to do any of that stuff.” Second adult: “I know, it’s so hard. I usually just make my husband do it.”

And here’s another morsel of information: Today I was talking with a girl at my daughter’s dance studio who said her school will give a class a night off from homework if the entire class turns in the previous night’s assignment. I asked her how often that happens - never for her class.

Remind me: why is all this busy work so important?

My kids love 3-D things. They’ve been having a lot of fun with Neave Anaglyph. It’s a website where you can “doodle in 3D”. Put on your 3D glasses and have some fun!

Some more fun free online games to check out are:

• Sand Game (This highly fun game is a perpetual favorite here. We had to try some of the combinations in real life. Check out the theme song, it’s amazing!)
• Line Rider (There are many fan video clips on YouTube. There is also a really cool Line Rider Fan Site.)
• Whizzball (Create your own Rube Goldberg machines or figure out the ones others have made.)
• String Spin Toy (A neat 3-D rotation simulation we just discovered recently.)

Our favorite 3-D movies include:

Our favorite 3-D books include:

The little girl’s alarm rang and she immediately slammed her book closed. Her 25 minutes of required reading for the day was up and she wasn’t about to read a second longer - she didn’t care if she was in the middle of a sentence, let alone a chapter. As the alarm rang, another girl (also doing her required reading) asked the first girl a question about how much reading her grade required (not a question about the content or anything fun). A parent, not a parent or teacher to either of the girls, interrupted the second girl and reminded her that she would have to have time deducted for the whole time she talked to the first girl (she talked about 15 seconds and the woman deducted about 5 minutes). The girl was afraid to complain for fear more time would be taken away from her total.

Welcome to the life of today’s elementary schooled child. The above is a factual story of girls waiting before their dance class where my daughter attends. They are often dropped off an hour (or more) before their dance class and required to sit that entire time and do their homework. Yet, they hesitate to do it until an adult can witness them because it doesn’t count until they get an adult signature (on a special form) for every single part — every day.

They are required to read 5-7 days a week for a set amount of time. Depending on the school, they might be required to write a summary report on said reading — every single day. They have word minimums on that summary report, too! [Reading e-books and magazines don't count for the required reading, and neither do audio books - which my daughters and I listen to all the time.]

What does this required reading do to these kids? It makes them HATE reading. Seriously hate reading. They read for exactly the number of seconds they are required to and not a single second more. It’s not fun. They hate it. Where I live, public schools have been back in session nearly three weeks now. At my younger daughter’s dance classes, we get to hear all about school, teachers, and homework during and after (and sometimes during with little comments) dance class. These kids hate the whole thing and they have no outlet to express these deep feelings.

Meanwhile, the group of homeschooled and unschooled children that my family hangs around with read so much they can’t get enough book recommendations. They read books like they drink water — this is the complete opposite of their schooled counterparts. And, yet people wonder why my family hasn’t gone the traditional American lifestyle route.

I don’t interact with a lot of schooled children anymore, so I’m always shocked when I overhear them talking about their lives. These kids aren’t lazy or stupid. They are brilliant small people who are getting the life sucked out of them and their souls torn away. I can see the glassy eyed looks behind their eyes. It isn’t good.

It needs to stop. The only way we can do this is by taking our children out of school and by not allowing the schools to dictate their lives.

Today is the one year anniversary of the blog on the Do Life Right website. I’ve highly enjoyed talking about veganism, Unschooling, Webkinz, arts and crafts, and more, over this past year. Expect more of the same.

Thanks to all my readers! This site has seen a lot of growth over the past year.

Interesting to me, here are the Top 10 most frequently read posts for Do Life Right over the past year:

1. Webkinz Winter Wonderland
2. Crazy (Stupid?) Webkinz Tricks — Balloon Room
3. Webkinz Mystery Pet
4. Yin Yang Webkinz Cow — Pet of the Month
5. How to find: My very own Webkinz Crown of Wonder!
6. How to: Get more Kinzcash in Webkinz World
7. Wire Gemstone Bonsai Trees
8. How to: Tie Dye with Sharpies
9. Webkinz in Unusual Places
10. Land of Enchantment

The following is a list of countries where people have visited this site within the past 6 months:

Anguilla
Argentina
Austria
Australia
Aruba
Belgium
Bermuda
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Brazil
Bulgaria
Canada
Chile
China
Colombia
Croatia
Cyprus
Czech Republic
Denmark
Dominican Republic
Egypt
Estonia
Fiji
Finland
France
Georgia
Germany
Ghana
Greece
Guatemala
Guyana
Hong Kong
Hungary
Iceland
India
Indonesia
Ireland
Israel
Italy
Japan
Kenya
Kyrgyzstan
Latvia
Lithuania
Luxembourg
Macedonia
Malaysia
Malta
Mauritius
Mexico
Moldova
Monaco
Morocco
The Netherlands
New Zealand
Niue
Norway
Pakistan
Paraguay
Peru
The Philippines
Poland
Portugal
Qatar
Romania
Russia
Samoa
Saudi Arabia
Serbia
Seychelles
Singapore
Slovakia
Slovenia
South Africa
South Korea
Spain
Sweden
Switzerland
Syria
Taiwan
Thailand
Trinidad and Tobago
Turkey
Tuvalu
Ukraine
United Arab Emirates
The United Kingdom
The United States of America
Uruguay
Venezuela
Vietnam
Yugoslavia

My family and I recently went on a tour at the Titan Missile Museum in Sahuarita, Arizona (south of Tucson). While close to us and very interesting, we are especially thrilled that Star Trek - First Contact was partially filmed at the missile site.

Here are some photographs of our experience. We didn’t get to touch the actual missile like they did in the movie (it is behind glass), but we did get to touch the parts in the museum area. Anyone over 5′ 10″ has to wear a hardhat (my husband easily saw why). Plus, a rattlesnake expert needed to be on hand just in case a rattlesnake made its way into the stairwell. There is a glass covering over the top of the missile so we could see into the top.

The museum is doing a special “Moonlight Madness” event once per month with special science experiments for adults and kids. We enjoyed it a lot.

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The survey is quick and easy and you have the potential of winning a really cool prize.

Thanks!

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Prickly Pear Jelly

I haven’t had the greatest luck in the world preparing jelly, so here is my “What to do when the recipes don’t work” directions.

Prepare syrup as pectin package indicates. Basically you need a lot of sugar, the fruit itself, and pectin. With this made, you supposedly just need to add more pectin. Once you’ve confirmed that it isn’t going to get solid, put the concoction back onto the stovetop and add cornstarch until it thickens. Ideally, you should add the cornstarch earlier with the sugar, but this isn’t possible when you are turning a syrup into a jelly. So, if you end up with a clumpy mess, blend it until it is smooth. Our jelly looked almost flourescent pink when we did this - we thought it was ruined. But, when we allowed it to sit and cool (in the fridge) overnight, it turned into perfect prickly pear jelly. Delicious!

My daughter has been enjoying making lots of prickly pear jelly and peanut butter sandwiches (or bagelwiches as this photo shows). Yum!

Vegan Prickly Pear Ice Cream

• 2 cups vanilla soymilk
• 1 cup prickly pear syrup

Stir into a Stainless Steel Midas Non-Motorized Ice Cream Maker. Stir (or whisk) after 15 minutes. Stir after another 10-15 minutes and serve. This handy bowl makes perfect ice cream, sorbet, gelato, or Italian ice every single time. We absolute love it! It makes enough for four servings when filled to capacity.

Here is a photograph of my kids making the ice cream:

Prickly Pear Frozen Wine Ice

• 2 1/2 cups wine or sparkling wine
• 1/2-1 cup prickly pear syrup

Mix as above. Delicious!